How to Write a Strong Essay on Handling Disagreements

Disagreements are inevitable, but how you navigate them reveals a lot about your critical thinking, communication skills, and ability to engage with different perspectives. This essay prompt asks you to reflect on a time when you strongly disagreed with someone and how you handled the situation. Harvard wants to see your ability to engage in meaningful dialogue, remain open-minded, and grow from the experience.

Breaking Down the Prompt

Harvard asks:

“Describe a time when you strongly disagreed with someone about an idea or issue. How did you communicate or engage with this person? What did you learn from this experience?”

Your response should address three key components:

1. The disagreement – What was the idea or issue? Why did you feel strongly about it?
2. Your approach – How did you engage with the other person? Did you debate, listen, compromise, or stand firm?
3. Your takeaway – What did you learn from the experience? Did it change your perspective or reinforce your beliefs?

Step-by-Step Guide to Writing Your Essay

1. Choose a Meaningful Disagreement

Not all disagreements are significant enough for this essay. Aim for an example that:

• Shows personal growth or self-awareness.
• Demonstrates your ability to engage in thoughtful discussion.
• Highlights an issue that matters to you (without being too polarizing).

Examples:

• A disagreement with a friend over a political or social issue.
• A debate with a teacher over an academic concept.
• A conflict within a club or team about a major decision.
• A disagreement with a family member about values or beliefs.

Avoid trivial arguments (e.g., a disagreement over a movie choice) or highly controversial, divisive topics that may overshadow your personal growth.

2. Provide Context and Tell a Story

Instead of simply stating what happened, use storytelling to bring the situation to life.

Example:
“During my junior year, our debate team prepared for a competition on climate policy. My teammate, Alex, argued that technological innovation alone could solve the climate crisis, while I believed policy and government intervention were equally critical. As team captain, I had to decide how to structure our argument. We were at a standstill, each convinced we were right.”

This introduction sets the stage for the disagreement and helps the reader understand why it mattered.

3. Explain How You Engaged with the Other Person

This section should highlight your communication style. Did you:

• Listen actively to understand the other person’s viewpoint?
• Ask questions to clarify their reasoning?
• Find common ground or compromise?
• Provide evidence to support your perspective?

Example:
“Instead of dismissing Alex’s argument, I asked him why he believed policy changes were unnecessary. He pointed to rapid advancements in clean energy. I acknowledged his points but countered with research on how government subsidies had accelerated these innovations. We decided to incorporate both perspectives, presenting a more balanced argument that earned us a top score at the competition.”

This response shows maturity, open-mindedness, and a willingness to engage thoughtfully.

4. Share What You Learned

Harvard wants to see growth. Even if your opinion didn’t change, you should demonstrate that the experience expanded your understanding or strengthened your ability to engage in discussions.

Example:
“This experience taught me that disagreement isn’t about winning—it’s about refining ideas through constructive dialogue. I learned the importance of approaching debates with curiosity rather than defensiveness, a lesson I now apply in conversations about complex issues.”

This takeaway emphasizes intellectual growth and an openness to diverse perspectives—qualities Harvard values.

Final Tips for a Strong Essay

• Be specific – Use details to make your story compelling.
• Show growth – Highlight what you learned from the experience.
• Stay balanced – Avoid overly aggressive or one-sided arguments.

Before you submit your essay, get expert feedback to ensure it’s clear, engaging, and aligned with Harvard’s expectations. Submit your essay for a free review here: Pathways’ Free Essay Check.

Strong essays make a difference—make sure yours stands out.